Everyone needs something from someone at one time or another. That’s normal—even expected. It’s one of the many benefits of having a professional network. But if that’s the only time you’re initiating contact, it comes across as one-sided. Though likely not your intention, you end up using people for what you need in the moment.
You can avoid falling into that pattern by being more intentional in how and when you reach out—so when you do need something, it doesn’t feel out of the blue.
Five Ways to Make Your Outreach Feel Natural and Easy
- Reach Out When You Come Across Something That Reminds You of Them
A lot of outreach feels forced because it starts with a goal instead of a genuine desire to connect. If you reach out when something brings that person to mind, the interaction has a grounded, non-selfish reason behind it. It reminds them of a shared point or something you have in common, and it gives you an easy way to reconnect.
- Anchor Your Interactions in Something External
Articles, blog posts, YouTube videos, TikToks—these are all great entry points to start a conversation. Include a quick note on why it stood out to you or how it connects to something you’ve talked about before. It gives the interaction direction and makes it easy for them to respond without having to figure out what to say.
- Keep it Light and Easy
Reach out just to say hi. Even something as simple as, “Hey, you crossed my mind—hope you and your family are doing well,” works. Not every conversation needs a purpose or a next step. A quick, easy exchange keeps things active without adding pressure, and those tend to stick more.
- Don’t Bombard
Staying connected doesn’t mean constant outreach. Too many messages can start to feel spammy, even if each one is well-intended. Give interactions space to breathe. A quick note here and there goes further than a steady stream. It keeps things easy and makes each touchpoint feel more intentional.
- Let the Other Person Take the Lead Sometimes
If you’re always the one initiating or keeping the conversation going, it can start to feel one-sided in a different way. Give the other person space to pick things up, respond in their own way, or not respond at all. Striking that balance keeps the interaction from feeling forced and gives it a more natural rhythm over time. If the other person never initiates, it may not be a relationship you want to put too much energy into.
At J2, we work closely with both talent and employers, so we see how relationship dynamics play out every day. We also recognize that networking doesn’t come easily to everyone. Let’s talk about ways you can cultivate a network of authentic relationships in a way that feels natural and easy.